My sickest bubble finish ever (brag and beat)...
 

396 places cash. We're down to 400 or 399 when this hand starts. I am dealt the Kiss of Death (we all know what this means) and time down a bit when it's my turn to act. Only two people behind me have me covered, but I might as well make sure we are hand for hand before I shove, just in case. Note that I have the guy who opened covered, so in order for me to bubble, all of the following need to be true:

-mesacosa1 or Sharkomaha calls my shove and beats me
-e-student folds, or calls and also beats me
-No one else in the entire tourney with fewer chips than me to start the hand busts.

Here's how the hand played out, of course (TBC after HH):


PokerStars Game #32738726433: Tournament #200909023, $300+$20 USD Hold'em No Limit - Level XX (700/1400) - 2009/09/11 23:39:44 ET
Table '200909023 72' 9-max Seat #4 is the button
Seat 1: olympia99 (60843 in chips)
Seat 2: Rogue23 (31806 in chips)
Seat 3: mesacosa1 (76312 in chips)
Seat 4: agamos (28923 in chips)
Seat 5: Sharkomaha (60569 in chips)
Seat 6: dyeti (16721 in chips)
Seat 7: Patrio (20935 in chips)
Seat 9: e-student (21388 in chips)
olympia99: posts the ante 175
Rogue23: posts the ante 175
mesacosa1: posts the ante 175
agamos: posts the ante 175
Sharkomaha: posts the ante 175
dyeti: posts the ante 175
Patrio: posts the ante 175
e-student: posts the ante 175
Sharkomaha: posts small blind 700
dyeti: posts big blind 1400
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Rogue23 [Kd Kc]
Patrio: folds
e-student: raises 5600 to 7000
olympia99: folds
(We get to Hand for Hand right here)
Rogue23: raises 24631 to 31631 and is all-in
mesacosa1: folds
agamos: folds
Sharkomaha: raises 24631 to 56262
(I begin to feel nauseaus right here)
dyeti: folds
e-student: calls 14213 and is all-in
(I feel much better here)
Uncalled bet (24631) returned to Sharkomaha
(AA for Sharkomaha and QQ for e-student are flipped up with my KK)
*** FLOP *** [Qh 6d Js]
(I throw up in my mouth a little bit here)
*** TURN *** [Qh 6d Js] [Jc]
*** RIVER *** [Qh 6d Js Jc] [9s]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Sharkomaha: shows [Ah Ac] (two pair, Aces and Jacks)
Rogue23: shows [Kd Kc] (two pair, Kings and Jacks)
Sharkomaha collected 20836 from side pot
e-student: shows [Qc Qd] (a full house, Queens full of Jacks)
e-student collected 66439 from main pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 87275 Main pot 66439. Side pot 20836. | Rake 0
Board [Qh 6d Js Jc 9s]
Seat 1: olympia99 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: Rogue23 showed [Kd Kc] and lost with two pair, Kings and Jacks
Seat 3: mesacosa1 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: agamos (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 5: Sharkomaha (small blind) showed [Ah Ac] and won (20836) with two pair, Aces and Jacks
Seat 6: dyeti (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 7: Patrio folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 9: e-student showed [Qc Qd] and won (66439) with a full house, Queens full of Jacks


OMG... The lobby says 397 players are left, and my stack is 0. FFS, am I about to pure bubble with fucking KK???

Someone, somewhere in this tourney with less than my starting stack at the beginning of this hand needs to bust, or else I've bubbled.

One minute goes by.
And then another.
And then another.

Finally, my table insta-closes, the lobby is updated and I see that I've finished in..............

396th place. WHEW!

wow - squeaker.