i didnt read the whole original post, as i think i got all the info that i needed when you said that this scenario had happened three times already, and that this was the first time that the player had asked to chop.
if you chop, then you should chop every time. if not, then never ask. you cant chop in selective situations and then be mad about it when the other player declines.
the dealer should have absolutely no say in the matter. this is completely unprofessional.
when i play live i am inclined to chop if it is the common practice. it is worth it in my mind to avoid the rake and in order to stay friendly with the other players.
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