You know what poker???
You can kiss my ass. You can kiss my ass and DIE!!!
I was having a nice session for a change today... I was 6 tabling, feeling good, playing good, and I was pretty much in charge of at least 5 of the 6 tables. Not only that, but I was getting some decent hands too. Through 375 total hands, I had AA 3 times and KK 4 times. With cards like this, I had BETTER be able to log a winning session.
I was just about to start sitting out of all my tables when this hand happened:
Full Tilt Poker Game #1420707403: Table El Camino (6 max) - $2/$4 - No Limit Hold'em - 16:20:28 ET - 2006/12/16
Seat 1: easyone52 ($82)
Seat 2: Kikoulol ($372.30)
Seat 3: Troll Pie ($444)
Seat 4: Flops Like Me ($418.30)
Seat 6: sarmar ($510.70)
Flops Like Me posts the small blind of $2
sarmar posts the big blind of $4
The button is in seat #3
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Troll Pie [Ks Kd]
easyone52 folds
SalMarina stands up
Diller21 sits down
Kikoulol raises to $18
Diller21 adds $80
Troll Pie raises to $60
Flops Like Me folds
sarmar folds
Kikoulol calls $42
*** FLOP *** [9h 8d Ts]
Kikoulol checks
Troll Pie bets $126
Kikoulol raises to $312
Troll Pie raises to $384, and is all in <-- this was a 30 cent raise
Kikoulol calls $0.30, and is all in
Troll Pie shows [Ks Kd]
Kikoulol shows [Qc Qs]
Uncalled bet of $71.70 returned to Troll Pie
*** TURN *** [9h 8d Ts] [Js]
I would have laid even money that a Jack was going to hit the turn.... not a Jack or Queen on the turn or river mind you, but EXACTLY a Jack on EXACTLY the turn. You see, because this would give me redraw outs, but we all know that's not going to happen.
*** RIVER *** [9h 8d Ts Js] [Ad]
Troll Pie shows a pair of Kings
Kikoulol shows a straight, Queen high
Kikoulol wins the pot ($747.60) with a straight, Queen high
So long, $747.60!!!
Troll Pie adds $328.30
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $750.60 | Rake $3
Board: [9h 8d Ts Js Ad]
Seat 1: easyone52 didn't bet (folded)
Seat 2: Kikoulol showed [Qc Qs] and won ($747.60) with a straight, Queen high
Seat 3: Troll Pie (button) showed [Ks Kd] and lost with a pair of Kings
Seat 4: Flops Like Me (small blind) folded before the Flop
Seat 6: sarmar (big blind) folded before the Flop
Fun fun. Two hands later, against the same exact same donkey opponent, this happened:
Full Tilt Poker Game #1420717731: Table El Camino (6 max) - $2/$4 - No Limit Hold'em - 16:22:22 ET - 2006/12/16
Seat 1: easyone52 ($78)
Seat 2: Kikoulol ($747.60)
Seat 3: Troll Pie ($400)
Seat 4: Flops Like Me ($416.30)
Seat 5: Diller21 ($80)
Seat 6: sarmar ($510.30)
easyone52 posts the small blind of $2
Kikoulol posts the big blind of $4
Diller21 posts $4
The button is in seat #6
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to Troll Pie [Jd Js]
Troll Pie raises to $18
Flops Like Me folds
Diller21 folds
sarmar folds
easyone52 calls $16
Kikoulol calls $14
*** FLOP *** [5h Qc 8h]
easyone52 checks
Kikoulol checks
Troll Pie bets $36
easyone52 folds
Kikoulol calls $36
*** TURN *** [5h Qc 8h] [9h]
Kikoulol checks
Troll Pie checks
*** RIVER *** [5h Qc 8h 9h] [Td]
Now, please note the river card here. You see, this is very obviously one of exactly 3 cards that could come that was designed to make me go broke.
Kikoulol bets $80
Fortunately for me, I saw througg their little plan and decided to save myself $266:
Troll Pie calls $80
*** SHOW DOWN ***
Kikoulol shows [Ah 6h] (a flush, Ace high)
Troll Pie mucks
Kikoulol wins the pot ($287) with a flush, Ace high
Troll Pie adds $134
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $290 | Rake $3
Board: [5h Qc 8h 9h Td]
Seat 1: easyone52 (small blind) folded on the Flop
Seat 2: Kikoulol (big blind) showed [Ah 6h] and won ($287) with a flush, Ace high
Seat 3: Troll Pie mucked [Jd Js] - a straight, Queen high
Seat 4: Flops Like Me didn't bet (folded)
Seat 5: Diller21 folded before the Flop
Seat 6: sarmar (button) didn't bet (folded)
Speaking of things that can kiss my ass, this graph can kiss my ass too... God forbid that first large drop off go TWICE AS HIGH in the opposite direction if my hand held up there, right? Bastards.
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